PERILS OF ON-LINE SUPPORT!

Lately I have the misfortune of dealing with on-line (telephone support people) regarding many different problems from travel, visa requirements, downloading software, banking issues, product return issues and more. I am not sure why I have had so many issues in such a short time, but there they are.  I must commend a lady at Verizon Wireless for her courtesy and knowledge – she is one good person that stands out of the so many ill trained, ill-disciplined and just don’t care what tour problem is – they have a script for that.

Part of the problem is geography. You call an 800 number and you get someone in the Philippines. When that person has a problem with your problem she or he transfers you to a “supervisor” that has just a little more knowledge, so you think – but that person is in Mumbai. The supervisor also is ill equipped or trained to answer your question so off you go to another part of the world. While waiting for that person to pick up you visualize yourself on an airplane going to that part of the world to strangle the voice on the other end of the line. The hold time is almost as long as the flight.

They have a script and they must read every word regardless of whether they are addressing your problem or not. They don’t slow down or pause for a split second. So finally in frustration you yell, “SHUT UP!” And of course they don’t. When and if they do, they say I must transfer you and before you can say “don’t” you are once again on hold.

The next person says that they can assist you like they think they really can. But first you must provide the last four digits of your mother’s maiden name, the street you were born on, and the address of your proctologist to verify that you are you! “Yes,” he says I can solve your problem, “ what is the problem?”

After two hours on the phone, listening to otherwise hysterical clerks trying t read their  poorly written scripts, speaking in strange high pitched accents, admonishing you if you don’t hear what they say you will forever be in problem limbo and nothing can happen and to this point, nothing has happened except your blood pressure has risen above today’s Dow!

Now this voice resonating several octaves below the last several vices you experienced, says slowly, in an authoritative tone, just click the little bar at the bottom of the page – and voila, the problem is solved. Huh! I just spent some long and arduous minutes, maybe even hours to get to this point. Why wasn’t squeaky voice one and squeaky voice number two or all the squeaky voices t rained to instruct the caller in the first place.

The squeaky voices come from call centers all over the world. The last guy was hemisphericaly local. In other words he knows his audience. He understood the culture that he was addressing. However, the product or service provider didn’t but should have known that we want immediate answers from people who can provide them.

I have had a phone tech support guy tell me that, “That is good.” When in fact I described a potential catastrophic problem that was looming. They are automatons that just know how to read scripts written for them by people who have no idea of what a problem is. They are not taught courtesy. They won’t listen because they have no idea of what the problem is – but talking over you and not taking a breath you will go away. But not before they ask you to take a small survey that will rate their service. Love the small 20 minute survey! “Please, sir, can you rank you experience today. One being the worst and ten being the best.” The experience was the rankest I have ever had. I have yet to give above a one and they are so appreciative – because, once again, they weren’t listening.

When they get back on the line they ask what else can they provide today. I always ask for their boss. The boss comes on and asks you to provide the last four digits of your mother’s maiden name, the street you were born on, and the address of your proctologist to verify that you are you!

That is when I tell them to stick it - where the proctologist does!

That is my take, what’s your experience?

SO MANY QUESTIONS - NO ANSWERS

We are all saddened, no not saddened, we are sick, no we are not sick at what happened, actually there are no words that can describe what we feel after what we learned what had happened Friday, December 14th in Connecticut. I am still not sure about what I feel but I do know that I don’t like what I feel. I do not feel the need for revenge and forgiveness is definitely not among my feelings. I am having a hard time as many of you, are in coming to grips with the feelings regarding this matter even though we may not know any of the victims – or ever will for that matter. Knowing them is not the issue, never getting to know them is the tragedy.

On the last night of Chanukah I watched with utter joy 13 children from about two years old to sixteen years old enjoy the holiday spirit – playing together, running around together, eating together, singing prayers together, and working games on the computer together with wonder in their eyes. Laughing and just enjoying life as they know it. Utter glee in my heart, utter joy in my eyes, utter love for the future that they represent and the future that is theirs for taking. Unless someone, one of G-d’s children takes it from them.

Why I am having doubts about there being an entity that we can’t see, we claim to feel, we can’t hear (although some say that they have heard that entity – we tend to put them in padded rooms), yet we extol His power, the power of this entity. His power to do what? There is no power except that which in in us. We have the power to do good, to educate ourselves, to nurture and love our family, to make the road of life smoother for our children and we have the power to do real evil. Just as it was done that Friday morning.  So, where does all this power lie?

We pray to a god. A good god, who knows? A bad god, who knows? An ambivalent god, who knows? God loves us is the mantra. Just listen to the rabbis, the priests, the mullahs, the pastors, the lay leaders all say that there is a god that loves us.  The Muslims have a strange way to illustrate that love. The Mormons exclude other of the G-d’s “children.” The Orthodox rabbis exclude the female sex of G-d’s children – where is all this love from this god? Where is His protection, where are His omniscient powers that allow Him to be where He is needed when He is needed? My point being, as I was leaning towards a specific point in a previous blog, there is no god like the one have come to accept. Not that G-d is dead. Remember that from the 60s? We came down hard that group that declared G-d dead. They may have been wrong because there has to have been a god that existed once to have died. Or one that existed only in mythology.

That belief really screws up the liturgy. The Shema is no longer a valid declaration. If there is no god then there is no “One.” As I stated in my earlier blog, I love religion, the beauty, the pageantry, sights and sounds if the services. There are some religions that do not celebrate the beauty of the religion, but for the most part, the costumes, the large hats, the robes, the small caps all play a part in delineating the beauty of the presentation. Every religious service is three part opera and can be entertaining and beautiful. Experiencing that play, like enjoying the Phantom of the Opera or the Book of Mormon or Guys and Dolls, can leave you uplifted and in high spirits when the curtain comes down. Is that not a religious experience? There is no god in any of those performances – maybe the mention of one, but that is it!

So where do we get comfort? Where so we turn in times like now that so many people are grieving, hurting with so much pain that the 1 to 10 chart does not apply. There is nothing to measure the intensity of the pain. Where do these people turn? They turn to each other for support. Giving to each other in a time of need is a religious experience and a good deed. Your spirit transcends the human experience. The god that we think we know is in some building down the road – maybe. There are so many questions here regarding the existence of a god that we have to ask if there are so many questions why bother asking. The answer is simple; there really is no god that we have believed for so many millenniums. Maybe at one time in our long history there was a G-d. But the idea of free will expanded with the widening of the universe, it expanded with broadening of our knowledge, with our experiences of the ages, with the acquiring of the process of thought, the acquiring of skills regarding the human body, with applied medicine, with the use of language, with the understanding of applied and quantum physics, all made the devotion to that G-d of old, no longer relevant.        

So, we should comfort the families, friends, the neighbors – anyone who has been touched by this senseless taking of precious life, including ourselves. Absolutely! We cannot understand the enormity of this event. “Why” doesn’t matter anymore because it just happened without a reason – at least any reason known to mere mortals. The One that we would have turned to for answers is longer available to us. He is busy protecting baseball players coming up to bat! The G-d that talked to Moses, not there. The G-d that endowed Jesus – not there.

When we look within we can extend our love and comfort out, letting those hurting know that they are not alone, that is truly G-d like work.

That is my take, you decide!

POST MORTEM - ELECTION 2012

I am letting my imagination run away with me. The election is over and the president is still widening his margin through the continuing counts so he will have a mandate. But nothing seems to change. Mitch McConnell is still saying that his first priority is to have President Obama not get re-elected, Dick (The Dick) Morris is still sure Romney is going to win, Sarah Palin is auditioning for Dancing With the Stars (doing the sidestep shuffle), and those are just a few of the diehards. Hey guys, you tea baggers you lost, your right wingers you lost, the people spoke – turn up your hearing aids!

John McCain is running – to or from what I don’t know – but runs he does.  Old John has trouble determining which Rice he supports. The one that lied to us way back then or the one that was fed bad info recently? Oh yes, it is the black female in the government. Joe Lieberman needs some WD40 for his voice, it is winey and squeaky. Michelle Bachman is still trying to create some newsworthy stuff that isn’t newsworthy –  it is just stuff. Some have suggested that she divorce her wife. Who says she isn’t for same sex marriage? Also, she is for no sex marriage. 

Good old Newt, he too, had it wrong as he does most of the time. At one time I actually thought that he was a bright man and so did he. Ron Paul is still upright and consents to have his pulse checked at least once a day. Then there is Rick Santorum (the definition of “santorum” was made up – but it was fun while it lasted) he said he will make another run for it – Macy’s sweater sale, that is! 

Why am I picking on the right wing (nuts)? They are easy and they were and continue to be wrong. Wrong about everything. The left characters are also easy except that none of them expound the science that a woman that has been raped has the internal mechanism to thwart the nasty sperm. I never heard a lefty define “legitimate rape” - ever. The lefties like Rap not rape!  

I saw the handshake between Obama and Romney, Once again I let my imagination run wild.  So many captions to write.  Such as “In this house, Mitt, my car does not ride up in the elevator with me.” “Mitt, that will be $19.50, it would have been more but you didn’t have the salad. ”  Or the best line that could really get Mitt in trouble is “How was the wine? I know you prefer whites.”

I saw Clint Eastwood walking around Ikea last week. He was talking to chairs. So much to say and so many chairs.

Boehner stills wants to get his tax lowering programs in place. Ahhh, the poor rich are so poor! I would agree with that but he wants all of us that don’t make that much money to chip in and help the needy rich people.  He didn’t get it before, he is not getting it now and not in the future. He is never in Ohio so he isn’t getting it at all.

Ann Coulter has balls – really! No, really!

I truly believe that Mitt is a good guy. He just doesn’t know what side of his white bread his butter is on.

That is my take – you decide!