The (not so very) Merry Month of May

One month can change your life in so many ways that it is mind boggling? That month was my “merry month of May!” The first day of the month of May is known as “May Day.” That is also a universal distress call and had I known what was to come I would have shouted “May day, "may day" at the top of my lungs, but you never know what is coming. Maybe that is a good thing. Have you seen the commercial that shows a postcard that says  "your heart attack will happen on  . . . ?" My card got lost in the mail as I had a series of them, but I called them GERD.

First up in May my son-in-law was due to have brain surgery on the fifth. The fact that he was having that kind of surgery freaked me out and made me and everyone in the family and friends quite nervous and somewhat scared. He has been part of my life for more than 35 years. We have been through much together and in that time we have created a bond that is strong and a love that is very much of my emotional make up.

He and my daughter did their homework and spent a great deal of time with the doctors to insure the best possible outcome. Still, it is brain surgery!

May fourth I have an appointment for a test that is like an endoscopy but there are another 16 letters in the name of the procedure. We are going to get to the bottom of my stomach and mystery of the intense GERD that I have been suffering from and  to see what is causing this malady.

While the attacks of my GERD could be intense they did not stop me from my Vietnam tour. It included much walking through different areas including many villages. Also the sights of Hanoi (including the infamous “Hilton). Visited battle sights such as the Citadel in Hue, the area of the Cou Chi tunnels outside of Saigon along with military cemeteries and memorials. I climbed the caves at Ha Long Bay, floated in the boat baskets near Da Nang and climbed through the Champa Ruins.

On the second of May I participated in a day long tennis event at the club. About four hours on the courts and another four hours at the party later that evening. And  yes, the GERD was with me and Tums took care of it, so I thought. In Vietnam I found Carboblast, Tums with charcoal. They worked, too, or so I thought.

Meanwhile, back to my May odyssey. The doctor that did the procedure on the 4^th of May gave me good news and a suggestion.  The good news was that my esophagus was clear and that was a good thing, however, he did ask me if it was OK to refer me to a cardiologist. That kind of threw me for a loop but I said OK, if you think so. Can’t be too sure of anything these days.

May 5^th I am in the hospital supporting my daughter and her family as my son-in-law is undergoing his brain surgery which seems to be taking longer than advertised. In our family no one goes through this kind of stuff alone. So, in addition to my son-in-law’s father and his significant other, his two sisters, one of his sons, two of his brothers-in-law and me. There was a crowd of loving and concerned family.

Cinqo de Maio is also the anniversary of the first of two heart transplants that my wife underwent in 1992. (That is another story for another time). So with that fact popping into my mind I was more nervous but kept this to myself. While waiting for the surgeon to report on my son-in-law’s surgery, I got a call from the cardiologist’s office offering two appointment times the next day.

I took the 3pm appointment as I figured I could leave there and then go to grandson’s baseball game right after that. WRONG!!!

The good news is that after a very long and tortuous wait, we got good news regarding the brain surgery. All went well. The surgeons accomplished what they set out to do and now prescribed a course to enhance the recovery process. We all let out a collective sigh of relief and shed a tear or two for joy. My job was then to get my eldest grandson from his high school baseball game. His younger brother came with me. When we finally found the field we took another sigh of relief.

Many of you may know that you DO NOT communicate with players during the game. Screw that. I yelled out my grandson’s name, got his attention gave him the thumbs up – the smile I got was priceless.

May 6^th. I go to meet the cardiologist. He checks me out, does an EKG and then tells me I have an appointment in the morning, May 7th at 11 am for an Echo Cardiogram at the Hollywood Medical Center. However, my situation is such that I have been admitted to the hospital now, while I was sitting there. I cannot leave. I will be transported by ambulance the medical center downtown. SHIIIIITTTT!

May 7^th (also my daughter’s birthday) I get to ride in the ambulance – no lights or sirens, very boring drive. I am whisked into the prep area to prepare for an angiogram. At 1pm they take me into the room where I am put out and the procedure to wind a wire with cameras through my body to my heart commenced. I was woken up and the cardiologists gave me the news. NO STINT – SHIIITTT, again.

I was taken back to the prep area while they find a room for me. Remember this is the day after the brain surgery. Recall all the people that were there yesterday, they all congregated at the foot of my gurney today. Needless to say, I was in a funk mood thinking about facing open heart surgery. Not a happy camper. Then my son-in-law rolled up in his wheel chair. He had big cover on his head reminiscent of what ugly Russian ladies wear. He had a large smile on his face. That was all the medicine that I needed.

May 8^th  then May 9^th and now we come to, May 10^th: Mother’s Day and my late wife’s birthday. We had a planned celebration of both her birthday and Mother’s Day. Our family was to open the treasure chest we created in her memory some 22 years before. Having both Mother’s Day and her birthday coincide, it seemed like a fortuna moment to remember her and  the best she represented. However, we were celebrating my son-in-law’s good outcome from his surgery and waiting for my day in the OR instead. Can't go home to have this little party. This was a confusing time for us all.

May 11^th – waiting for the surgeon to tell me when it will be my turn. I just want to put this behind me. In the interim I changed rooms three times. The first was a double room with a gentleman who had his wife there as his advocate. The second that a single room that was a “pressure room.” That was like trying to sleep under a 747 about to take off.  The third room was a charm. Quiet, private and near the nurse’s station.

May 13^th. Yes, the 13^th! They told me that is date for my surgery and the time will be 11 am. I tell my kids. Then they tell me that the time will be 7 am. If they want to see me before they need to be in Hollywood by 5 am. I am not getting up at that hour to see me, but they were there. Taking my cues from my late wife, I smiled to them and said “see you later.” I did.

Five days after the surgery I made it home and here we are in June. We all survived May. In June we all celebrated the graduation of my eldest grandchild. She is off to college but first a trip to Maui for her. My son-in-law has a unique look with his caps and special sweat pants and sporting a full beard.   The beard is now a medical necessity.


We are all on good track with much to look forward to. Friends have called, some brought food because they think I am losing too much weight, I even made it to the movies.  My grandkids want to see the scar – why, I don’t know! I don’t even want to see the scar.

That was the MERRY MONTH OF MAY. We are all looking forward to the coming months where the celebrations are all positive – Bar and Bat Mitzvahs, new schools, new adventures.

That is my experience - nothing to decide -- done!